We are moving soon, like in a few days soon. The new place isn't far and it is quite familiar (my parents old place.) I'm glad to be out of the apartments even if only for a little while (the move is short term.) I had a hard time packing though.
I had a hard time putting all my James memorabilia into a box. I had a hard time closing the box. I had a hard time thinking of anyone else carrying that box or opening it up. It was the only box I labeled. It is the only one that matters right now.
This is the only home James ever knew. These are the only walls he ever saw. Now I am going to a place with no memories of him, a place he never played, never grew, never was.
But it is a place full of other memories. A place I grew. A place my other kids played. A place that has a lot of "should have beens."
James' will be the first box I unpack, it will be the first thing I find a spot for.
