Life can be good. I hear my daughters playing nicely together (sure they are suppose to be cleaning their room but...) We have had dinner as a family almost every night this week.
I miss my son, I miss my dad, but I am so grateful for the people I do have here with me. I love my daughter so much. I love watching them grow and learn. I love my husband, I love how he has grown in our ten years of marriage, I love that he is finally out of school.
I love my mom, she is AMAZING. I love my sibling, nieces, nephews, in-laws, uncles, aunts, grandparents, cousins. Right now I feel so grateful for all the people in my life who have supported me during the last few years.
Little things, like eating dinner as a family seem so big right now. I want to hold on to these memories. I keep reminding myself that it is OK to enjoy life. You can still smile while you miss people. I think I was scared to care so much, scared to actually love. Scared to hurt again.
I don't ever want to relive these last few years. But God is faithful and He will continue to be faithful. (sometimes I need to just say it out loud and remind myself it is true.) I pray that when hard times come they will not be as hard of times and that I will remain faithful too.
